I'm sitting here by myself (Hayden is asleep) and can't help but have so many emotions right now. My sweet angel Emma has a brain tumor. We hoped and prayed it was just vestibular, but an MRI proved us wrong. The symptoms are both very similar. She's been in Starkville since Monday. This, so far, has been an extremely long restless week for us. We miss our baby. We were faced with options to help her. Surgery, radiation, or chemo. Or the best would be the combo of all three. We, unfortunately, can't afford to do all three. After researching and talking to the neurologist we came to the decision surgery is what is best for Emma. Surgery is highest risk, but highest reward. We've been tireless scrapping money together and will worry about the rest later. This is what our baby needs and we owe it to her to try. If we did nothing she would have days to a month at most. Hearing the complications and problems that 'could' happen make me want to throw up. Knowing that she may never leave there makes my feel so sick. I know this is the only shot we have at saving her and giving her some relief so I have to remind myself this is the best we can do. Some of you are reading this rolling your eyes thinking its just a dog.. Well it's not to us. This girl has been part of our family since the day we got her. Our dogs go everywhere with us. I'm a strong believer in if you don't like dogs (not just the ones that just don't have a dog circumstance can cause that) at all I probably don't trust you. I'm sorry if that offends you, but it's how I feel and I've proven myself right time and time again. Dogs love unconditionally and show no judgement. They demonstrate so many Godly characteristics that we should. Dogs and children have so much in common as far as being heaven ready to me. Emma has taught me so much. The little things matter to dogs and children. They seem to slow down to play unlike adults. Unconditional love is the biggest lesson. If I was upset and crying and she ever heard me she would run up to me and push that big ole face into mine like you can't cry mama look at me I love you! Even through her last few days before going to Starkville she would do that. Jeffrey got to know Emma around a year old. He instantly fell in love with her and that has been his baby. Those of you that know us know we have another precious dog, Baxter. He was all puppy for so long and took a while to train and had to grow on everyone (but me !). Emma sleeps next Jeffrey in the bed. He wouldn't have it any other way. We spoil them and we like it that way. Out of the two Emma is our tuffy. I admit Baxter is a bit of a baby. You would never ever know Emma was hurting. This is why the tumor has been growing for some time and we had no idea. It's very large, but it's the most common type and (if you can say this) in the best spot for surgery removable. I had no idea until all of this that so many dogs have tumors! Researching all of this has opened my eyes. Though there's no prevention we could have done, I'm just praying we haven't gone too long without catching it. The only bad thing we are facing is its size. Her little brain has compensated overtime for this large tumor and has squeezed into the back of her neck. Her body has just adapted. This is what dogs do, very different from humans. We depend solely on our brain to run stuff, where dogs depend on the brain stem. A tumor there is far worse. During surgery they will de-bulk as much as safely possible. Surgery doesn't mean it will be all gone, it just means they will remove as much as possible safely. We pray that's the majority! You also have to worry with the cells freaking out with all that space back and causing fluid to build back up. This will happen some, we just don't need to see a lot of it. And of course bleeding on the brain is a worry during surgery. The best way to get rid of this is surgery then some rounds of radiation. Together they cost over $12,000. We couldn't do both so surgery it is. Dr. Shores has been practicing for a long time and has done this several times. We are confident in him. We know people are praying for Emma's safety and for the Dr. Knowledge. This is our only hope and option to save our girl. Even if you're the type it's just a dog (do me a favor and delete us as friends after this) please remember this is weighing heavily on Jeffrey and I. We've been an emotional mess. There's been lots of crying, worrying, and prayer for us. This girl means a lot to our family. Our sweet Hayden has been walking around calling for her. They have the sweetest bond. Her surgery will begin at 9am Thursday (tomorrow). It will take 3 hours. The next 48 hours are very crucial to her survival. If we can make it to Saturday afternoon we will be able to take a breath. Think about us please.
My mom and dad have been rock stars through this. We haven't had to worry about a thing with Hayden and Baxter. They've jumped in and kept them both as we make the journey back and fourth to Starkville. My house has been straighten up by mom too so we just got to come home and enjoy Hayden and rest. These little things mean a lot to us. My aunt Chele has researched and helped us through this process the entire time. We would have been lost without her. All the text and post from friends and prayers are amazing. We appreciate everyone. Our sweet friend Emilie as soon as she found out she has offered to help with Hayden ride with me down to Starkville. Whatever we've needed. She has really touched our heart and is the purest most devoted friend and Christian. We love you Emilie!
Thanks y'all for standing by us through this tough time. Pray for dr. Shores as he will be handling our angel tomorrow and pray for strength for Jeffrey and I and most importantly Emma.
We appreciate our friends and the prayers more than you know. Love your fur babies a little tighter today too.
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